what i want, you've got, [ seth + rachel ]

[seth hall]

[ I'M WIDE AWAKE AFTER THE RIOT , THIS DEMONSTRATION OF OUR ANGUISH ]
this empty laughter has no - - reason like a bottle of your
( favorite poison )

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"Seth! Seth, come on," little Samantha urged, tugging on my hand while I lingered a few feet behind her, if only to spite her a bit. I loved the hell out of my little sister. There was a good chance that I'd consider her the most important person in my life. She was certainly the most precious, with what me not knowing just what her fate would be, but that was beside the point.

"Calmez-vous," I laughed, whipping out a bit of French. I was one of the few males at Carmel High that took the language, and definitely only one of two straight guys. No one really believes that I'm straight. I have absolutely no problem with those of the other persuasion, but I just know that I'm not one of them. Not that anyone ever believes me. Ignorance, that's what it is. Just because I'm not in the pants of a different girl every week, that doesn't mean I'm off shoving myself in guys. I just liked the language, so I took the class. Not that I gave a shit about anyone in my school, anyways. Most of them were douche bags.

She rolled her eyes and tugged harder on my hand. She wasn't like most kids her age, though that was probably because she spent more time in the hospital than anything else. Mom Home Schools her so she doesn't miss out on too much. I tried to get her to Home School me, too, but she wouldn't go for it. I miss too much, too, considering I always insist on skipping to sit in the hospital with Sam whenever she's there, but I guess that excuse doesn't fly. Though, despite her lack of being in social situations, she certainly did act like the typical twelve year old girl, attitude and all.

I'd agreed to take her out to the park, because it was a beautiful day outside and she was apparently feeling healthy. She had tried to swing it so she could go by herself, but I think it'll be a long while before she's trusted out on her own. My parents always like to keep her under a close watch and, hell. I'm a typical big brother. I'm over protective and a bit of a dick when it comes to her freedom. She's not allowed to date until she's twenty five. I told her she wasn't fighting me on that one.

And then she hit me with a foam sword, but it was my fault for having such terrible timing to drop that piece of news on her.

When we reached the playground, she finally released my hand and set off to join the others. I kept a close watch on her. With her cancer, she bruised ridiculously easy and was so damn fragile. I'd feel horrible if anything happened to her while we were out. I didn't want her to relapse. It was safe to say that I was scared shitless whenever she was admitted into the hospital, simply because I never know if she's going to come back out. If she ever beats this damn thing, and she's perfectly happy again, I'm probably going to end up pushing her around a little, placing the blame on her for my damn sensitivity (because I blame her for being the kind of guy who cries relatively easy -- I was blubbering during The Notebook). But, hell, I worried about her.

I kept following her with my gaze as I settled on a vacant bench on the outskirts of the playground area, smiling absentmindedly as she quickly fell into step with a couple of kids. I was always afraid that her peers would avoid her due to the fact that she was completely bald, and it'd bugged me when she stubbornly decided to skip the hat when leaving the house earlier. I guess the youth of today wasn't all that bad.

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6 8 2 | words |
you're makin' my dreams come true, halls & oates | music |
rachel!. | tagged |
this sucks, fff | notes |
t-shirt and jeans, nbd | outfit |
murder city - green day | lyrics |
holly @ caution 2.o | credit |

[rachel berry]

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LITTLE DARLING, THE SMILES RETURNING TO THE FACES
little darling, it seems like years since it's been here
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<sup>I was sat cross legged on my bed, listening to The Fame and flicking through a notebook I had filled during the summer vacation. There were pages dedicated to every soloist in New Directions, and the genres and sub-genres that suited them. Below that were songs we could possibly practice that they could take a solo in. Obviously, mine and Finn's pages were the most filled, as we were the most talented singers in the ensemble, in my eyes. We were the power couple, and that was the way it was always meant to be, Quinn or no Quinn. When Poker Face came on the stereo I tensed slightly. It reminded me of the duet I had done with my mom, Shelby Corcoran, the director of Vocal Adrenaline. Not that she remembered me as her daughter, I assumed, now that she had Beth to replace me. She just saw me as the powerful lead in the rival show choir, not one related to her. I switched the stereo off and looked at my reflection in the mirror, straightening the headband on top of my head and then padding down the carpeted staircase into the kitchen where my dads were eating French toast and flicking through old photo albums.

Grabbing a piece of French toast, I peered over the shoulder of one of my dads and smiled when I saw a picture of me with a trophy. That summed up my life, from birth to mid-late adolescence. As cute as this little arrangement was, I decided I wanted to take a step away from the normality that was surrounding my life at the moment. Enthusiasm for the glee club was slow after our loss at Regionals and no one wanted to come round and practice some songs with me (I doubted they would have wanted to anyway). "I'm just heading out for a bit. Don't miss me too much." I said to them, pulling on a cardigan that I had draped over one of the chairs around the kitchen table. My dads looked up and then one of them replied to my comment. "But there's a special on one of the music channel. Top 50 Songs From the Musicals." He told me. I bit my lip. Now I wanted to stay in and eat popcorn and pray that the top song was one of my favourites, possibly from Les Miserables or Wicked or Funny Girl. Barbra Streisand was a goddess. "Record it for me." I demanded with a sweet smile, grabbing a purse and shoving my set of house and car keys in, walking out of the door and waving over my shoulder before shutting it.

I drove down the roads, taking in all the sights as I did, not sure where I was heading. There was a part of my sub-conscious that was driving my car to a certain place, but it was like the rest of my brain was preventing me from knowing where it was. Until I saw the sign. 'Now Entering Akron, Ohio'. I frowned and switched my radio up slightly, and trying to drown out my thoughts. My mind had driven me here because I still wanted closure from Jesse, because Finn didn't pay much attention to me over the summer, attention Jesse would have devoted to me. I missed Finn incredibly, and I was so lonely I was having to resort to coming to Akron to possibly catch site of my ex. I pulled my car up outside of the park and getting out, putting my iPod touch headphones in and wandering around the park aimlessly, trying to spot someone I recognised before they tried to egg me again. Faithfully by Journey came on, and it brought back memories from Regionals. But instead of sad ones, because we had lost, they were happy ones. Ones of Finn. Of love and passion. I couldn't help but sing along quietly. "Restless hearts, sleep alone tonight, sending all my love-" I stopped when I saw someone that registered with my mind sitting on the bench I was passing. He had been at the party. I waved and sat down slowly "Hello. I wanted to.. thank you" I told him, as if that was why I was in Akron. He never had to know the true reason.</sup>

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LITTLE DARLING, I FEEL THAT ICE IS SLOWLY MELTING
little darling, it seems like years since it's been clear
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tagged; seth
lyrics; here comes the sun by the beatles
listening to; faithfully by glee, of course! <3
word count; 715 w/out code
outfit; pink cardigan, plum high waisted skirt and sleeveless blouse and black ballet shoes.
credit; to brooke (template) and sarabi! (picture) from caution

[seth hall]

[ I'M WIDE AWAKE AFTER THE RIOT , THIS DEMONSTRATION OF OUR ANGUISH ]
this empty laughter has no - - reason like a bottle of your
( favorite poison )

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

To say that I’m protective over my sister is, I suppose, an understatement.

I probably looked like a down right idiot, the way I was craning my neck to keep her in sight. It concerned me, because it didn’t look like she was being careful and she was running pretty quickly. I’d probably start crying if she fell and hurt herself or something -- I’m sort of pathetic like that. But she didn’t have a care in the world, no. That was apparent in the way she shrieked and giggled when she was pushed to the side (while I winced). I had nothing better to do than make sure she was doing alright, anyways. That was, of course, until I heard a female voice coming from my right.

I didn’t recognize it at first, so I slowly tore my gaze away from Samantha, and instead turned to look at who had joined me on the bench. I set sights on Rachel Berry, a smile immediately brightening up my face. I hadn’t gotten the chance to speak to her at the party after I’d defended her, and it was pretty disappointing. I mean, I had a good feeling that something positive would come out of being around her. I guess that’s because I’m a guy and anything remotely pretty walking on two legs gives me a good feeling, but whatever.

From what I gathered, Berry was more than just a pretty face (though she was quite gorgeous). She was talented, smart and tried her best to be nice. Yeah, she might’ve been a bit over-confident, but confidence was sexy. As was her outfit. I tried to think back to what I’d heard about the McKinley High Glee Club, and tried to think about whether I’d heard of her having a boyfriend or not. I remembered when Jesse St. James tried to be a world class douche (and succeeded, damn boy), but I didn’t think there was any word about a new squeeze in this girl’s life.

Yes.

So, perhaps I was a bit out of line, just meeting this girl and already putting it in my head that I was going to get a cuddle or two out of it, but hell. Why not? I was known for assuming things quickly and I didn’t suck with women. Plus, she just struck up conversation with me. Not like I was completely out there, right?

“Hey Berry,” I replied with a grin, swaying to the side to nudge her playfully with my shoulder before settling back. “Fancy seeing you here. I may make a habit to leave my house more often if you’re going to make a habit out of taking trips to Akron.”

Damn. That was cheesy.

I offered her a smile before looking back up to find my sister, casually shrugging. “Anyways, it’s no problem. I know that Vocal Adrenaline’s been going pretty rough on you guys, and you don’t deserve it. I mean, they go around school bragging about what they do, and you guys haven’t really done anything. They think they’re all cool, but… Really, I think most of ‘em are lame.” With a pause, I laughed with a hint of bitterness. “No wonder Carmel shuns me. Doesn’t matter. I’d rather go a year without talking to anyone than have a bunch of sucky friends.”

I grinned slightly, and extended my hand towards her. “I’m Seth, by the way. Seth Hall. Pleasure to meet you.”

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5 7 6 | words |
murder city - green day | lyrics |
holly @ caution 2.o | credit |

[rachel berry]

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LITTLE DARLING, THE SMILES RETURNING TO THE FACES
little darling, it seems like years since it's been here
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<sup>I watched his face as he begun to formulate a response to my words. I wondered what was going through his head at the moment, and hoped it was something along the lines of 'She came back? Result'. Many people would frown upon me thinking such things, as they all thought I was dating Finn, and I hoped I was too. But the romantic, adorable baritone whom I had fallen head over heels for last year had become something of a stranger to me. And I was enjoying the attention I had been receiving, I guess I had been right about the fact that being part of something special makes you special. Smoothing out my skirt I waited patiently for him to reply, looking up with my signature smile as I listened to his words. They were more flirtatious than I had expected, and something most people would turn their noses up at because it sounded like something out of the movies. But it was good that I liked movies, right? I opened my mouth slightly to speak but he carried on talking, so I closed it just as quickly as I had opened it. Contrary to popular belief, you could be talented and confident yet still be polite.

He had a nice smile. Welcoming, friendly and warm, with good teeth. I looked away from his smile, the thing that had ended up getting me interested in Mr Schuester, my glee club director. I had a thing about oral hygiene, you had to open your mouth to smile, talk, kiss.. and most importantly, sing. I wondered if he could sing. I wondered if he was interested in transferring to McKinley and joining New Directions, although most of them would be cautious of him ever since Jesse. When he introduced him I smiled again and shook his hand, leaving mine there for a few moments after shaking it and then moving it away, back onto my lap. "Akron is larger than Lima. And seeing as I'm destined for Broadway, I should start getting used to cities, right?" I said. He probably wouldn't like my reference to Broadway, people found it precocious and thought that I was too confident in my own talents. But the cheerleaders were happy to show as much skin as possible under the power motto 'If you've got it, flaunt it'. Why shouldn't that refer to my singing, my acting, my dreams. My aspirations were important to me, as my life wasn't anything too exciting right now, I lived in the future.

My smile turned into a smirk as I begun to formulate my next words. "I don't let them upset me too much. So our glee club didn't win Regionals this time round. I'm safe in the knowledge that most of them will end up working in dead-end jobs and getting their fix of singing in the shower. Plus, we intend to beat them this time." I said, laughing lightly and tucking some of my hair behind my ear, looking up at him again through my eyelashes this time. This would probably be perceived as flirting as he didn't really know me, but I was quite a dramatic and friendly person. My flirting was much more straight-forward, it wasn't for the people who easily scared off. It took me back to Finn, our encounter in the auditorium when he had left me after kissing me... At bowling when he was trying to convince me to give up with Cabaret. We had been such a great match because his flirting was obvious too, and it did wonders for my ego. Surprisingly, as with most people's, it needed to be topped up when I was feeling low. "I'm Rachel Berry, but you already know that." I beamed and looked back down at my clasped hands in my lap. I wasn't trying to suggest that everyone knew who I was, but he had already referred to me as Berry, and stuck up for me at the party after the party-thrower had insulted 'Rachel Berry' rather than saying it straight to my face. Typical Vocal Adrenaline vocalist, suppressed by Jesse's leading talent.</sup>

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LITTLE DARLING, I FEEL THAT ICE IS SLOWLY MELTING
little darling, it seems like years since it's been clear
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tagged; seth
lyrics; here comes the sun by the beatles
listening to; as long as you're mine by wicked (obc)
word count; 688 w/out code
outfit; pink cardigan, plum high waisted skirt and sleeveless blouse and black ballet shoes.
credit; to brooke (template) and sarabi! (picture) from caution

[seth hall]

[ I'M WIDE AWAKE AFTER THE RIOT , THIS DEMONSTRATION OF OUR ANGUISH ]
this empty laughter has no - - reason like a bottle of your
( favorite poison )

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I tore my attention away from Rachel momentarily as I searched around for my sister who, during my moment of distraction, had disappeared from my sight. I frowned, craning my neck until I spotted her again, then relaxed back against the bench. I was such a mess. I couldn’t even stop worrying about her long enough to give my undivided attention to the gorgeous girl sitting beside me. But… Really, Rachel was gorgeous. The thought brought my focus back to her and I grinned, fighting the urge to look her over. I wasn’t very subtle and the way to a woman’s heart wasn’t by checking her out while holding an innocent conversation, that much I knew. Plus, while I was a stereotypical male in the way that I liked to look at women, I was no pig. I prided myself in being a gentleman.

“Akron is larger than Lima. And seeing as I’m destined for Broadway, I should start getting used to cities, right?”

[/I]

I laughed at her blunt words, though found myself grinning more at her lingering hand than anything. When she retracted it, I folded my own into my lap and smirked down at her playfully. “I suppose that you should get used to large cities, you know. But Broadway, eh? I should have figured you’d be into that, since you’re in Glee Club, but then again most of Vocal Adrenaline isn’t. But they’re douche bags, so it’s okay.” I chuckled, smiling brightly. “So, who do you aspire to be? Barbara Streisand? Alice Ripley? Idina Menzel? All of the above?” Yeah, I knew my stuff, and I was flaunting it. Samantha went through a Broadway phase about a year ago and blasted show tunes through the house. While she got over it, for the most part, it stuck with me and I did a good amount of research. Of course, the prospect of wooing Rachel would probably push me to do even more research, but that was beside the point. A little gay, though, I was sure.

I… Shit, what if she thought I was gay? Quick, comment on her chest.

No. Too obvious. Damnit.

“My sister knows a lot about Broadway,” I continued quickly, “Went through a phase about a year ago, so I learned a lot of, uhm, stuff. I mean, it’s pretty good music, of course, I listen to it sometimes, but like… I… Listen to other stuff too, and…” I winced, closing my eyes. That didn’t go as smoothly as I’d hoped.

Sure I was blushing, I silently thanked God that she took the conversation further to the point where I could be manly and slam Vocal Adrenaline. That was manly, right? Maybe I’d talk about beating someone up. But I’d never done that. Plus… She didn’t seem like the type of person to enjoy violence, did she? She was probably the one getting bullied at her school. I just didn’t care about anyone in mine. So no, violence would not be a good place to bring the conversation. I don’t want her to get the wrong impression of me. Then again, if she thought I was gay then that would be worse, and… I had some serious work to do. It’s hard keeping up the appearance of an innocent, compassionate straight guy. I mean, that’s what I was, but most people think I’m gay.

And trust me. I support the rights, but I’m most definitely straight.

I couldn’t help but smile when I heard her speak about how she imagined Vocal Adrenaline would end up. “I could only imagine, you know. It’s about time we got to hear someone with a decent voice saying ‘would you like fries with that’. I’m sure most of the people working at McDonalds now couldn’t hold a note if they tried.” My smile widened and I nudged her softly, playfully. “Of course, no one can hold a note like you. Or, at least, that’s what I hear. I look forward to hearing my sister blast a soundtrack from a show with your voice through the house.” I offered her a gentle nod before continuing, “And yes. I already know that. I mean, of course -- I’d be crazy not to.”

Boy, was I pushing it. [/size][/blockquote][/blockquote]

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7 0 8 | words |
murder city - green day | lyrics |
holly @ caution 2.o | credit |

[rachel berry]

people change and promises are broken
clouds can move and skies will be wide open

[/size][/center][/color][/i]

I watched him closely as he began to talk about Broadway. I loved talking to guys who actually knew things about musicals. Especially this much. Most guys (Kurt being an exception) either knew nothing about Broadway and probably thought the West End was California, or were limited to knowing that the Wonderful Wizard of Oz was a musical and that I liked them. Seth, however, was a dream to talk to about this. I sort of wanted to pick him up, and put him in my pocket (although he was taller than me by far, so he'd probably be putting me in his pocket). I could see us becoming best friends. Of course, all the people he had mentioned were brilliant actresses and singers, and I couldn't possibly pick one out of them. Barbra Streisand was a goddess and I had all of her songs from Funny Girl memorised. People said I looked a lot like Idina Menzel, and I had seen her in Wicked on Broadway. Her and Kristin Chenoweth had blown me away. Alice Ripley was a veteran in theatre and had been born and raised in Ohio like me, just proving we could break out of our box. Plus, she had played Fantine in Les Mis, and I was still cut up over whether I wanted to play Eponine or Fantine if and when I got a part. They were both mezzo-sopranos like me, and a lot of amazing people had played them in the past.

Before I could answer though, he started speaking again. Stumbling over his words slightly, trying to make excuses for his knowledge. He was sweet. I liked him. I grinned and put my hand on his lightly "Seth, it's okay. It's good you like Broadway musicals. They're amazing, and it's hard to find guys who respect them. I'm happy you do. And in response to your previous question, they're all amazing. I aspire to be like all three of them." I said, my smile widening even more as I moved my hand back to my lap. I didn't want him to feel uncomfortable, I mean, we were only having a brief talk at a park. He probably thought I was a bit intimidating or, you know, crazy. I was loud, I understood that, and ambitious, but these traits were side effects of the fact I was so focused and talented. I laughed when he spoke about Vocal Adrenaline and McDonalds. I could imagine it, them in their flashy costumes with my mom in the back listening, with baby Beth eating fries out of the packet and Dakota Stanley standing on the counter (to make himself taller) and criticizing their dancing through a loudspeaker. He reminded me a little of Sue Sylvester, except he was short and she was tall. Maybe they should hook up and have bossy, medium sized children, although there were rumours going around that Miss Sylvester couldn't actually have them (not that I believed rumours, I was usually the subject of them).

After he nudged me and said those words, something weird happened. My heart started beating faster, my pulse thudding in my ears. I could feel the blood rushing to my cheeks and I looked down at the bench, embarrassed about how his flattery had effected me. No one could hold a note like me? He was amazing at giving compliments, I'd give him that. And when he said he was crazy not to know who I was, I had the sudden urge to grab his face (gently, of course) and kiss him. And hug him. And thank him. Not many people outright complimented me like that, and it felt so good when they did. He was treating me like a princess, and chivalry had such a way with me. "Th-thank you. I mean, I've had a lot of training. I've been singing all my life. But it's so nice to hear someone say that to me. I'm flattered." I said, looking up at him and smiling, waiting for the colour to fade from my face. I dug my nails into my palms as I looked at him, scared he was going to laugh in my face and tell me it was all a joke and he thought I was insane, then get up and leave me. I looked away, trying to get those thoughts out of my head, and watched some of the children play on the park, carefree and happy.

TAGGED ! [/color]setherson! <3
MUSIC ! for a pessimist, i'm pretty optimistic - paramore
WORDS ! 741 w/o code!
OUTFIT ! as above.
CREDIT ! MEELA! on CAUTION 2.0![/font][/size]

[seth hall]

[ I'M WIDE AWAKE AFTER THE RIOT , THIS DEMONSTRATION OF OUR ANGUISH ]
this empty laughter has no - - reason like a bottle of your
( favorite poison )

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

She was so pretty.

I was hardly thinking of Samantha by now; I’d kick myself for my carelessness later, despite the fact that deep down I knew there was no need for me to keep such a close watch over her, but right now, the only thing I could focus on was the female beside me. I moved quickly. Not on purpose, no, but my urges and thoughts got ahead of me and the desire to lean in and kiss her was growing stronger by the moment. I should have scooted further away. We were treading dangerous waters and I didn’t want to put her into an uncomfortable position, just as much as I didn’t want to get immediately rejected. I mean, hell. I figured I stood a chance. She was single (as far as I knew -- didn’t girls usually go on about their boyfriends when they had one?) and pretty and nice and I was certainly intrigued by her. I wondered if she liked to cuddle. I could imagine us cuddled up on the couch, her head on my chest and my arms securely around her, watching… Whatever the Broadway aficionado’s equivalent to ‘The Notebook’ was. RENT, maybe? Probably. I could imagine us giving each other cute little nicknames like… The Angel to my Collins or the Mimi to my Roger or something. I could rock the Roger look, I bet. Unbutton my shirt a bit, yeah, that would work. I didn’t have AIDS, though. That was probably good -- I assumed she didn’t either. But yes, we’d curl up and be cute and I wanted that. All I had to do was lean in, and…

She started talking about Broadway, and how she was glad I liked it, and I blinked. Well, I suppose it was good that I didn’t have to be freaked out about that. She didn’t seem to think I was gay, so that worked out well. I mean… At least when (if) I made a move, I wouldn’t get a “what? I thought you liked men” in response. I think that would be worse than a legitimate rejection. Of course, as soon as I felt her hand cover mine, my heart rate increased exponentially and I looked down at them. Just as I rose my thumb to link it with hers, a slow attempt at deepening the embrace we had, I felt cool air rush back to the space she’d been occupying just moments before. Shit. I missed my chance. My heart sank and I glanced back up at her, an almost disappointed smile on my lips. “I-I, well… Yeah, I mean. I guess it’s true, that my sister is the reason I got into it, but I don’t like admitting it. Most people don’t think it’s the… Well, straightest thing for a guy to like. Which is stupid, you know, I think people can like whatever they want to, but I hate it when people get a false opinion of me for some reason. So… I try not to admit it a whole lot. But I do like Broadway.” I tore my gaze away from her and nodded ever so slightly, looking down at my lap. “I can see you being any of those. You’re right. They are amazing, and you’re amazing, so… It fits.” I grinned, leaning back on the bench.

I looked up, luckily, just in time to see her blush and thank me for my compliments. I smiled, then, genuinely -- it was nice to know I could do that to her. I mean, I didn’t know what she was thinking but I figured it wasn’t that I was overly corny. She appeared quite obviously flattered and I made a mental note to start complimenting her more often. It seemed as though she’d enjoy that. “Training or not, I’m sure you’re still flawless when you sing,” I grinned, then continued, “you’ll have to sing for me someday, so I can judge it for myself.” I found myself, then, leaning in -- I needed to stop, but she was so close. So pretty. I gained enough sense, however, and my lips simply brushed her cheek, one arm winding around her waist to pull her a bit closer to me. I retracted both my face and my arm once I was satisfied with the closed distance between us, and decided to quickly change the subject.

“See that girl over there?” I began, immediately spotting Samantha in the crowd and pointing to her, “the one without the hair. That’s Sam, my sister. I bet you’d like her. I’m sure she’d like you, anyways. She asked me to take her to the park today, since she’s feeling well and all.” Probably a pointless subject to switch to, but I didn’t want to give Rachel the opportunity to comment on my forwardness. “She’s got cancer, by the way. We’re not some sort of weird family who makes her shave her head or anything.”

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8 2 9 | words |
murder city - green day | lyrics |
holly @ caution 2.o | credit |

[rachel berry]

people change and promises are broken
clouds can move and skies will be wide open

[/size][/center][/color][/i]

I had to admit, if I wasn't romantically involved with Finn, I would probably be attracted to him. Not that I didn't still have feelings for Jesse, but that was because deep down I knew I hadn't coped with the end of that relationship healthily. But Seth was charming and he was knowledgeable about musicals, which were two big things I looked for in guys. I had been with Noah for a while, and although he was neither of those, I had probably fell for him for popularity, physical attraction and a sense of feeling needed. I'd since tried to guard my heart more, even though it has been broken numerous times, and been more specific about the guys I chose. When he spoke again, I watched his mouth move and then rolled my eyes when he said people didn't think it was the straightest thing for a guy to like. Ridiculous. There was nothing gay about liking Broadway, it was called be cultural. The idea that people assumed anyone with the male reproductive system that liked musical theatre was gay irritated me to no end. Not everyone was like Kurt Hummel and could reach the high F in Defying Gravity and wore corsets and danced to Lady Gaga instead of Kiss. Some simply enjoyed the (usually) light-hearted themes and songs that were different to the hip-hop and RnB typically favoured in popular culture. "I like guys who aren't afraid to admit what they truly enjoy, it shows a new side to them. I'd be lying if I said I didn't care what people thought of me, because to some degree I want to be liked and popular, but I don't go around showing some restricted and contained version of myself. If people find me annoying and egotistical then that's their problem, right? I said, finishing with a slight and small smile.

And then he complimented me again, and there was a strange feeling inside of my chest. My heart swelling with joy, I told myself, but my mind began to wander to seeing him as more than a friend. I mentally cursed myself for having thoughts about someone else while I was with Finn, but being polite I just smiled and thanked him quietly, looking down at my lap and tucking my hair behind my ear when it fell in front of my face. Before I could say something to break the mid-conversation ice, he spoke and flattered me once again. I couldn't help but blush once more. "I love singing. I could sing right now, but.. You should come along to our invitationals later this month. You're welcome back stage before the show, although I'll be getting changed and warming up my voice for the most part, or forcing my less motivated peers into action." I replied, laughing slightly at the last words and linking my fingers together loosely. I was pretty sure I had found a new friend in him but then he went and did something that made me think otherwise. He pulled me closer and kissed me on the cheek. And suddenly everything was a blur and I couldn't hear myself think properly and I was pretty sure I should be on a respirator due to my breath being short and choppy. My cheeks started to ache and I wondered if he had bitten me, but then I realised it was because I was grinning. I liked it? But I was with Finn. My heart was already torn between two people, now there was a third party? Nervously, and slightly embarrassed, I opened my mouth to tell him about that, but he spoke before I could.

I looked towards where he was pointing, and observed the girl, his sister, play. She was pretty, and seeing as Seth said she would like me, I automatically liked her. Not many people liked me, so I cherished each and every one of them. When he said she had cancer, I bit my lip. I had assumed so, but to assume makes an ass out of you and me (or so my dads had told me), but he had confirmed it. I felt sorry for her, for Seth, but I didn't want to patronise him by saying 'aww' or 'I'm sorry', so I conjured up something to say that sort of side-stepped the comments about her illness. "Well, I'd be happy to be her friend. Age is nothing to me, a kindred spirit is a kindred spirit no matter the age difference. And she obviously has good taste if they're similar to mine." I smiled and looked at him with my best warm and friendly 'you know you can talk to me about anything' look in reply to the fact his sister had cancer. It must be tough for him to see her when she was in pain, and talking to someone outside of the family could be good for him. I returned my gaze to his sister and sat quietly, as I waited for him to speak, and just watched her play without so much as a care in the world, despite of everything she must have been through. Instantly, I had tons of respect for her.

TAGGED ! [/color]setherson! <3
MUSIC ! dare you to move - switchfoot
WORDS ! 866 w/o code!
OUTFIT ! as above.
CREDIT ! MEELA! on CAUTION 2.0![/font][/size]

[seth hall]

[ I'M WIDE AWAKE AFTER THE RIOT , THIS DEMONSTRATION OF OUR ANGUISH ]
this empty laughter has no - - reason like a bottle of your
( favorite poison )

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I went pale as she started talking about how she liked guys who weren’t afraid to be themselves. It wasn’t like I was striving to be somebody I wasn’t, because if that were the case I would have long since thrown away every ounce of dignity I’d managed to hold onto over the years and join Vocal Adrenaline. That would have been really terrible, because I would’ve just been doing it for the popularity status. I couldn’t really sing and I was too awkward to dance, so I probably wouldn’t have made it in anyways, but I didn’t want to try anyways. But now I felt stupid because now she wouldn’t like me because I rarely admitted that I liked musical theater. Quick. I had to redeem myself. “Well… In that case,” I began, clearing my throat and grinning cheekily, “I’m Seth, and I enjoy musical theater, cooking, and playing the drums. I also like chocolate, Harry Potter, and you. I don’t like Twilight or oranges, though. But I’m a sucker for a good Italian dish.” There. Grinning, I nudged her side gently then leaned forward, propping my elbows up on top of my knees. “I’m surprised you aren’t liked and popular. I mean, I guess my judgment on ‘cool’ is pretty clouded, but I think you’re pretty awesome. I don’t see you as annoying or egotistical. Don’t worry.” Confident, yes, she was certainly confident, but not egotistical. At least not from what I could see. Anyways, by now I’d turned my flirtatious attitude on full blast and I had to hope she wasn’t scared away. I mean, I kept shooting her compliments and from my experience, girls seemed to like that, but… Never knew, I supposed.

Plus, it was hard not to compliment her. After all, she kept blushing in that insanely adorable way whenever I did, and I wanted to see how red I could get those cheeks of hers. I brightened up when she invited me to the William McKinley Glee Club invitational’s, and I nodded enthusiastically. “I’d love to come,” I responded truthfully, “You’ll need to let me know exactly when it is, and how early I can come visit you backstage, of course. But yeah. I’ll totally be there. Front row, if I can manage it.” Smiling softly, I made a mental note to bring her a bouquet of flowers. Girls liked that, right? Yeah, in the movies, guys always brought flowers. So, I’d have to see if I could dig out of her what kind of flowers she liked. Stupidly, and probably painfully obvious, I pointed over to a man-made flower bed nearby, gesturing to a specific flower in the corner. “Ah, that’s pretty. Wonder what that’s called.” Worth a shot.

I beamed as Rachel confirmed that she wouldn’t mind being Sam’s friend. I was sure that she was just being nice, but it was good to know that she had a good heart. I mean, I already suspected that, but this confirmed it and made me like her that much more. And hell, she didn’t slap me when I kissed her cheek, so I figured I stood a pretty damn fair chance. Smiling proudly, I straightened up, chuckling lightly. “Yeah? Well, I’ll introduce you in a little bit. She probably shouldn’t be out here much longer, since she tires easily, but… If you want, you can come with me when I take her home, and maybe we could watch a movie or something. Or we could go out and watch a movie, or go grab a bite to eat, or.. Something.” It was unclear as to rather I was asking her out as a casual friend or for a trial date, but I supposed it could be taken other way. I bit my lip, silently hoping -- no, begging -- that she’d say ‘yes’. I really would have to get Sam home soon, but I didn’t want to cut my conversation with Rachel short.

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6 9 3 | words |
murder city - green day | lyrics |
holly @ caution 2.o | credit |

[rachel berry]

people change and promises are broken
clouds can move and skies will be wide open

[/size][/center][/color][/i]

I smiled when he re-introduced himself to me. Not that he had to, but of course I'd come to learn that was the kind of guy Seth was. Alongside musical theatre (obviously the one that stood out in my mind, but that's just me being biased), he liked cooking. I didn't really do much cooking, my dads like take-out and restaurants and the closest thing I did to preparing myself food was making smoothies and toast. But it wasn't the worst thing for someone to like. He enjoyed playing the drums? I really knew where to find these drummer people, didn't I? First Finn, now Seth. It was like they considered me a drum and they wanted to bang me... On second thoughts, that had sounded completely inappropriate and I won't be using that phrase again any time soon. Chocolate was good, intense comfort food for when I was upset or simply felt like being melodramatic. As for Harry Potter, I didn't hold it in the highest regards, but of course, films without people bursting into song aren't my sort of thing. And I didn't understand the attraction some people had with Daniel Radcliffe. I froze on his next words. Me? Had he just said he liked me? Come to think of it, he had been pretty flirtatious. Did he.. did he have a crush on me? I looked down at my lap for a few moments, trying to hide the awkwardness I felt inside, and concentrated on his words again. Twilight. Ah, okay, so the entire female population of the world was slumped at Edward and Jacob's feet, whereas I hadn't been swept into the fad. I'd seen the films, sure, who hadn't? They were easy-watching and I could certainly identify with Bella, I knew how it was to be caught between two equally-stunning males. But I wasn't 'Team Edward' or 'Team Jacob' or even 'Team Switzerland'. If anything, I was 'Team Elphaba' (and I just cracked a Wicked joke and only I could benefit from its hilarity). As for oranges and Italian food, I liked both. As he spoke, I nodded, making sure it didn't look like I had spaced out while analysing each and every word. "Well, if we're introducing ourselves.. Hi, I'm Rachel Barbra Berry. I too adore musical theatre, Les Miserables, Funny Girl and West Side Story being some of my favourites. I lead a complicated life, having two gay dads and my biological mother being the coach of our rival show choir. I like singing, glee club, exercising, dancing. I don't like people who don't like me. Or people who can't sing yet think they're outstanding. Or being confused. No, I definitely appreciate knowing where I stand with someone..." Especially boyfriends, I finished in my head. But I had trailed off, afraid of saying too much, and instead I begun fiddling with sleeves of my cardigan. When he spoke again, he complimented me and I smiled, I was a sucker for flattery and that was apparent. However, I couldn't help but feel like my thoughts from earlier were being confirmed...

He was going to be at the fall invitationals, which I suppose was a good thing. Apart from my dads, I feared I would have not one ally out there in the crowd. But what if he saw me with Finn? What if he had thought I had led him on and that deep down I was just malicious and liked playing guys around? Worse, what if he just left and never spoke to me again? I needed to somehow tell him of Finn and, well, Jesse, before this whole thing got too serious. But how could I do that without hurting his feelings? This was all so new to me, for years guys hadn't looked twice at me; apart from Jacob, but he was a completely different story. And now I was fighting them off with a sword (kind off) and the feelings where overwhelming me. When he asked what the flower was called, I bit my lip. It was pretty, but I wasn't a gardener or a a florist, and truth be told I hadn't the slightest idea of what it was called. "You're asking the wrong person. The closest I get to flowers are the ones my dads buy me for Valentine's day." I really shouldn't have said that, it was completely embarrassing. Who still got presents from their parents on a day meant for relationships? What if I had just encouraged him to get me flowers? Oh crap, what if he was going to bring them to Invitationals in front of Finn and the rest of the glee club? They would think it was Jesse all over again. I laughed it off though, my best "please don't mock me because I'm sweet and innocent" laugh. I watched his mouth move as he spoke, trying to concentrate on something so I wouldn't turn the colour of a beetroot. Being introduced to his sister would be good, she was young and naive and that would hopefully dispel the awkwardness I was currently experiencing. And then he asked me out. Well, out to get something to eat, but it sounded a lot like a date to my ears. And then it occurred to me. Seth thought I was single, or at least, completely over Jesse and his shenanigans. If I brought up relationships maybe he would calm down a little (not that he was excited in that sense). It would just make him aware that I was taken. Maybe I could ask him for advice? "That sounds great, really Seth. I'm up for that." I replied, taking a breath as I conjured up the nicest way to say to him I'm no longer public domain. "Uhm. Seth, before we, move somewhere more public... I, well, you're the only friend I have outside of McKinley, and the only unbiased one as well. You look like you would give good advice, and I need some. Because my guidance counsellor told me to talk to my Rabbi last time I went." I smiled, adding a little humour to it so that it didn't seem so serious. "You see, I'm having guy trouble, and you're a guy. So, well... I think I have a boyfriend, at least, he told me he loved me and then never spoke to me again. And I'm kind of high-maintenance, I admit it, and he hasn't been there for me. Anyway, I saw Jesse a few days ago and it felt like all my previous feelings had re-appeared. It was daunting, and intimidating and I have no idea what to do. Do you.. have any advice?" I asked, clasping my hands together and looking at him apprehensively, waiting for a reply. Maybe I'd scared him off? Maybe he didn't have any feelings for me and now he thought I was crazy and he wanted to run away? I really needed to sort my life out.

TAGGED ! [/color]setherson! <3
MUSIC ! home - glee!
WORDS ! 1161 w/o code - mid-teen rachel crisis!
OUTFIT ! click here
CREDIT ! MEELA! on CAUTION 2.0![/font][/size]

[seth hall]

[ I'M WIDE AWAKE AFTER THE RIOT , THIS DEMONSTRATION OF OUR ANGUISH ]
this empty laughter has no - - reason like a bottle of your
( favorite poison )

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Things were going swimmingly.

I mean, we were having amazing conversation, for starters. I liked her and she seemed to like me and we were both having fun just sitting around and talking. We’d go out, eat, maybe cuddle up on the couch after, let our romance bloom like some sort of cliché love story, and then end it with cute little kisses that would lead to one passionate kiss by her car before she left, but not before we’d arrange another date. Yes, only this date there would be me cooking, some cuddling under the stars, perhaps some dancing, some show tunes… Yes, something that I knew she’d adore. All girls would adore that, right? Right, yeah. I had this in the bag. I sure knew how to pick a winner. Grinning to myself at this fact, I turned to her as she followed my lead and introduced herself in more detail. “That’s a good list of likes and dislikes,” I praised, nodding my head before furrowing my brow as I thought back to what she said about the rival show choir director being her mother. Wasn’t Vocal Adrenaline the rivals? Certainly there wasn’t anyone else. Tilting my head to the side, I looked at her; come to think of it, she and Shelby looked strikingly similar. “Wait…” I began, musing over this, “You mean Ms. Corcoran? Man, I never would have thought…” Trailing off, I quickly shook my head. “Sorry, it’s none of my business.” But, you know, maybe when we started dating, she’d open up and tell me these things…

I felt even happier as she confirmed that we could go out for a bite to eat after I got Sam home, and I started to stand, but when she brought up the words ‘guy trouble’, I sank back down, my heart following suit. I listened in closely as she spoke, nodding periodically as the previous high I’d built myself up to came crashing down around me. Right, why had I been so stupid as to assume she was taken? She had given me no indication left or right that this was true, and she was pretty. It was no wonder she wasn’t available. But then she started going on about Jesse St. Frickin’ Douche and my stomach did a flop. Alright, alright. So there were two men in her life and that left no room for me -- I had to deal with that. But Jesse St. Douche? Really? I had no shot because she still had feelings for the idiot who broke her heart then egged her? Well that was a self esteem blow. But, of course, I had to go give her advice on the matter, and I shifted slightly on the bench. “I, uh, well…” I began, rubbing the back of my neck awkwardly. “I don’t know. I mean, I guess if you don’t like your boyfriend or if he’s not doing you justice, you probably should… Break up with him. And if you still have feelings for Jesse, well… I guess… I guess talk to him? I don’t know how he feels about you, but uh. Guess it’s worth a shot.” I sighed -- I really just wanted to get out of there, now, before the conversation could further. But I’d already invited her to lunch and there was no way I was going to back out of that due to something she didn’t even know about. So I smiled, convincing yet fake, and patted her knee. “Anyways, let me get Sam and we’ll take her home, then… Go to Olive Garden or something. It’s not too fancy, a good place to chill with friends, yeah.”

With a nod, and before she could respond, I stood up and cupped my hands around my mouth. “Hey Sam!” I called, and she looked up at me with a ‘you have terrible timing’ look. But she gestured her hand downward, and I knew the cue, crouching low to the ground. She came running in my direction and jumped on my back, her arms circling around my neck and my arms hooking around behind her knees. I straightened up, looking back at her teasingly. “You better watch it. Eat any more French fries and I won’t be able to carry you like this much longer.” Sam stuck her tongue out. “Who is that? Your girlfriend?” With a roll of my eyes, I lightly pinched the skin at the back of her leg and she grimaced, wiggling slightly on my back. “Rachel, this is Sam. Sam, this is my friend, Rachel. She’s going to walk home with us, alright?”

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7 8 1 | words |
murder city - green day | lyrics |
holly @ caution 2.o | credit |

[rachel berry]

people change and promises are broken
clouds can move and skies will be wide open

[/size][/center][/color][/i]

I agreed with him when he said it was a good list of likes and dislikes. The best. At least, it differed from the stereotypical response of Twilight, alcohol and sex, which would probably be what a cheerleader would have said. Even the ones in the 'celibacy club' (if you could call it that, more like a sexual frustration society), like Quinn whom I had always thought of as a devout Christian, were doing the nasty with the jocks and bullies. It made my stomach churn, and it almost made me envious. I mean, I broke down way before Jesse and I even got to second base. It made me feel like there was something wrong with me, everyone else was just so blasé about sex and their virginities like it was brushing their teeth or something. It wasn't that I didn't want to have sex, it was just I was waiting for the right person (how I knew if it was the right person, I have no idea). Why I was even thinking about sex I wasn't sure, my stream of consciousness was all over the place today. Seth mentioned Shelby's name and I looked back up at him, raising my eyebrows a little. "She is very similar to myself in some ways, although I hate to say it. We're both talented and driven, we look similar and we both love Barbra Streisand." I smiled at the last bit. I had to admit her rendition of Funny Girl was brilliant, she was very theatrical, and when she sung I Dreamed a Dream from Les Mis I had suddenly felt connected to the woman who had abandoned me at birth. I was about to tell Seth about the time we had sung Poker Face and how it had felt to be reunited with my biological mother when I noticed the changes in his facial expression.

I had hurt him.

Suddenly, I felt awful. When he began to give me advice and faltered over his words, I bit my lip gently and watched him, trying to tell him how sorry I was through my eyes. I didn't want to apologise out loud, that would embarrass him further, and I had done a good job of that already. He was giving me advice however, and it showed just how kind he actually was. He was putting my feelings before his own. I looked away from him, not only because I felt as guilty as sin but because he was telling me to talk to Jesse about that. My heart had been telling me to do that for a while now, yet my head kept overruling it and sanctioning me for even thinking about it. But Seth had just confirmed it, and for all I knew he hated Jesse. Wait, what if he did hate Jesse? This would have hurt him even more than if it was just Finn. I knew Jesse wasn't popular with the people outside of Vocal Adrenaline that weren't good-looking females. My heart began to hurt and I didn't even know why. All of this was information I already knew, yet it was agonising. Like my heart was yelling 'I told you so' to my brain. When I looked back up at Seth my vision was blurred from the threatening tears that had amounted as he had spoke. I tried my best to blink rapidly and get rid of them but the more I did so, the more unclear my sight got. I wiped them gently with my fingertips, trying not to smudge my mascara. If it had been anyone else I would feel vulnerable, it wasn't often I showed my weaknesses to people, too afraid they would mock me. "But, I'm scared of getting hurt." I replied, my voice barely a whisper, but he had already begun talking about another subject so I put on a brave face and hoped my comment had got lost in the atmosphere before he heard it.

He patted my knee and it was like the relationship we had just built up had suddenly combusted and all that was left behind was the foundations and charred remains. We were going to Olive Garden after we had dropped his sister off and suddenly I felt much less enthusiastic about it. It would be awkward and full of silence, so unlike the conversation we had just had. But I had already agreed, and despite what had just happened he was still my friend. Surely we could overcome this minor obstacle. I watched his sister run over from the comfort of my seat on the bench, and once she was on his back I stood up next to Seth, my fingers gripping the sides of my skirt slightly when Samantha asked if I was his girlfriend. It wasn't that I was embarrassed about the idea of being romantically linked to him, but I was worried it would remind him of what just happened. He introduced me to her and vice versa, and I raised my hand in a half-wave. "Hey Sam. I hear you like Broadway? Do you have a favourite musical?" I asked her with a smile. Maybe if I was nice to his sister Seth would forgive me. As we headed back to his house I walked next to him, keeping up with ease despite being shorter than him. If I could walk next to Finn, I could walk next to anyone.

TAGGED ! [/color]setherson! <3
MUSIC ! one - glee!
WORDS ! 904 w/o code
OUTFIT ! click here
CREDIT ! MEELA! on CAUTION 2.0![/font][/size]

[seth hall]

[ I'M WIDE AWAKE AFTER THE RIOT , THIS DEMONSTRATION OF OUR ANGUISH ]
this empty laughter has no - - reason like a bottle of your
( favorite poison )

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I nodded periodically as she spoke of the similarities between herself and Ms. Corcoran, but inwardly, I was cringing. Did that mean I was attracted to a member of the Carmel High faculty? Because they did look really similar and I thought Rachel was pretty and adorable and sexy. I’d just have to remind myself of Ms. Corcoran’s age and everything because I didn’t want to even think about that. It was disgusting. I decided not to comment on that, though, because it seemed like she had some pretty bitter feelings towards the subject and I was sort of afraid of upsetting her further. Of course, I wasn’t paying close enough attention after my little advice spiel to see that she had cried a little bit or to hear her voice that she was scared. If I had, I probably would have gathered her up in a ridiculously tight hug to let her cry on my shoulder until she felt better. As it stood, it was probably best that I didn’t hear because then I think we both would’ve felt even shittier.

I was always in a bit of a happier mood when around my sister, so while I was still upset about the blow from earlier, I was feeling better. She wrinkled her nose when Rachel spoke to her, looking down at me. “Seth,” she whined, “you guys talked about me?” I smirked up at her, shrugging a shoulder. “Of course. You’re just lucky she brought up one of the nicer things I said about you. I’m sure you’d have been embarrassed if she’d brought up the strawberry incident.” Her eyes widened and she rose her hands, covering my eyes. “You didn’t!” I didn’t answer. I could see through a sliver in between her fingers that we were headed towards a low branch, and since her intentions were for me not to see, I pretended I couldn’t. She shrieked right before we reached it and I ducked beneath it, so we just barely missed it, and she slapped the back of my head. “That’s what you get for blinding me.” She huffed, pouting down at me before turning back to Rachel. “My favorites are RENT and Wicked and Grease,” she answered, “What’s yours?”

I sighed, my mind sliding back to the topic of earlier. I sort of felt bad for cutting her off like that. “Hey, Sam. Cover your ears a second,” I instructed, and she wrinkled her nose. “Why?” “Because I have something private I’d like to tell Rachel.” She rolled her eyes. “I wanna hear.” With a sigh, I shot back, “It’s about sex.” With a rather loud “ew”, she grimaced and I knew she’d tune us out. Biting my lip, I looked down at the girl beside me, removing one hand from Sam to place comfortingly on top of Rachel’s head.

“So… Listen. I’m not really the best guy to give advice on the matter because… Well, I guess I’ve just never liked Jesse. And since I’ve never liked Jesse, and since he was a jerk to you, my own personal opinion would be to forget him. But I know you don’t want to, or can’t, or whatever. So I guess the best you can do is talk to him and everything, see what comes of it. He’d be crazy not to miss you and he’d be crazy not to regret what he did. You’re a great person so I’m sure you can get him back if you want to.” I sighed, hoping this was helping in some way or another. I didn’t want the rest of the day to be awkward and I didn’t want her to hate me. “I guess just know that I’m here for you, y’know? As a friend. Probably doesn’t matter much to you, because we just met and all, and you probably have a lot of better friends at school and in Glee and stuff, but… I guess, if you ever need someone to talk to, you can call me and everything, or come over or I’ll come to you or something. Just wanted you to know.”

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7 2 1 | words |
murder city - green day | lyrics |
holly @ caution 2.o | credit |

[rachel berry]

people change and promises are broken
clouds can move and skies will be wide open

[/size][/center][/color][/i]

As I watched Seth and Samantha I began to wonder what it'd be like to have a younger sibling. I'd probably hate it because they'd get some of my attention and I'd end up trying to sabotage them in some way. That, or they'd be less talented than me and I'd just show off to my dads. Come to think of it, it was good I didn't have a sister or brother because it would show the bad side of myself and even I didn't like seeing that. But I was glad Samantha was here because she seemed to be cheering him up sufficiently after I'd depressed him. It was quite nice to see them messing around actually, it was taking my mind off of Jesse and Finn. She asked me what my favourite musical was and I shrugged slightly. I would answer, but I'd have to think of a few that she would know first of all. Everyone knew Les Mis and everyone should know Funny Girl (you didn't get any better than Barbra), but just in case... "Good choices. I adore Wicked and I loved Idina in RENT too. Grease is iconic, in fact Olivia Newton John was one of the judges at the competition I was just at with my glee club." I said, remembering how Aural Intensity had found out about the judges and done a medley of their greatest hits. We'd been cheated out of being placed. Before I got sidetracked again I finished what I was saying. "I love Les Mis, but who doesn't? Hairspray is good too. West Side Story, obviously. Sweeney Todd was a little gory but the music is beautiful. And Funny Girl, which deserves a large-scale revival." In short, I loved every musical, really. I could go on about it all day but even though Seth had said she enjoyed musical theatre I didn't want to bore her.

Seth asked her to cover her ears and I raised my eyebrows slightly, wondering what he was going to say that couldn't be heard by his younger sister. Then he mentioned sex and suddenly my heart began beating like a hummingbird's wings and my breath was short. I wasn't sure why it frightened me so much to hear him say he was going to talk about sex. I thought maybe he was going to try and get in my pants, even though it seemed out of character of him. Maybe I had been too trusting, I mean, that was all guys wanted at the end of the day, right? Or maybe everyone at Carmel knew how I was still a virgin and Jesse had told them how I had turned him down because I was afraid of making love to him so soon into our relationship. The colour creeped onto my cheeks and I fanned my face a little. I felt like the ingénue out of a fifties film or musical. So innocent and naive that the word sex made me blush. It didn't, really, I wanted sex as much as the next person and I got turned on as much as the average teenager, but I had asked him for advice and maybe he thought I wanted advice on sex which I really didn't. He put his hand on my head and I was suddenly very grateful he had put it in such an appropriate place, it calmed me a little. Or maybe he liked the way the sun made my hair glisten. Oh gosh, what was wrong with me today?

But once he started talking again all my fears were washed away. It had all been a ploy to stop his sister from listening in (and nearly stopped me from listening, too). He was just being a gentleman and continuing the advice from before. He did think Jesse was a jerk, so I had been right about that. When he said I could come to him about things, I smiled at him and removed his hand from my head to hold it between mine. "It means a lot. I don't have that many friends, really, not many that can be trusted. Everyone cares more about their reputation. However, can I ask why you haven't liked Jesse? I know he's dramatic and charms his way closer to girls, maybe ones you have liked. But he's a good guy really. Or at least, it had seemed like it." I let go of his hand and let mine fall back to my sides, biting my lip a little. After I had mentioned that he was naturally flirtatious I began to worry he had found someone else. Even if he wasn't officially dating someone, maybe he was having casual sex. Something he hadn't got for me. Something I hadn't given him. I looked back at the ground again, trying to forget those thoughts.

TAGGED ! [/color]setherson! <3
MUSIC ! frozen - madonna (it's still in my head)
WORDS ! 806 w/o code
OUTFIT ! click here
CREDIT ! MEELA! on CAUTION 2.0![/font][/size]

[seth hall]

[ I'M WIDE AWAKE AFTER THE RIOT , THIS DEMONSTRATION OF OUR ANGUISH ]
this empty laughter has no - - reason like a bottle of your
( favorite poison )

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Samantha was overly excited at the conversation regarding Broadway, I observed. I could tell because her grip on me was becoming increasingly tighter at her eagerness, and she seemed to not have much regard for the fact that she was practically pulling my hair out. “Who’s Olivia Newton John?” she asked confused, and I piped up, “She played Sandy.” At this, Sam gasped over dramatically and slapped her hand on the top of my head. “You met Sandy!?” she gasped, looking down at Rachel with fascination. “Oh my gosh, you’re so lucky! I’m going to be in Glee Club when I get to High School.” At this, I spoke a firm “no”. I figured she was looking at me in confusion, so I continued, “Carmel High Glee Club is not something I want to get you involved in. They’re not good people.” She wrinkled her nose, loosening her grip on me. “Why?” I sighed. “Remember how we’re always telling you to play nice?” “Yeah…” “Well, they don’t play nice.” “Like what?” I groaned -- she always asked too many questions. She took my groan as an ‘I will not answer that’, and instead turned back to Rachel. “I’ve heard of those but I wanna see ‘em. Seth says he’ll take me to New York City to see a bunch of shows when my cancer is gone. He says I’ve gotta keep fighting and then we’ll go spend two weeks there and see a show every night. He says he’s been savin’ up for it. Isn’t that right, Seth?” I chuckled, squeezing her leg. “Yes, that’s right.”

I watched as she took my hand in hers, my heart leaping uncomfortably at the touch. But it was then that I realized I had to stop doing that. My crush on her had come quick and I was hoping I could extinguish it just as quickly. Yeah, I liked her, but I figured I could put those feelings behind me. This was the first time I’d properly talked to her and she had a boyfriend and another one in mind; I certainly couldn’t think I stood a chance at this point in time. So instead of being happy at the gesture, I remained apathetic, smiling softly.

“Well, I don’t care about my reputation,” I responded proudly, giving her hand a comforting squeeze, and I sighed when she asked why I didn’t like Jesse. “He just. He’s a jerk. He goes around school thinking he’s one of the greatest people on earth and he bullies people who aren’t in Vocal Adrenaline and he hurt you. I’m pretty sure that means he’s a jackass. He’s cold hearted and if you go back out with him, I’m going to be ridiculously concerned about you constantly. But I can’t really make the decision for you. You know him better than I do, so I guess it’s your choice in the end.”

[/color] I shrugged and retracted my hand, noticing we had finally arrived at my house. I hoisted Sam off of my shoulders and rested my hands on her shoulders. “Say goodbye to Rachel, Sam. We’re going out to eat.” Sam huffed. “Bye, Rachel.”[/color][/size][/blockquote][/blockquote]

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5 5 2 | words |
murder city - green day | lyrics |
holly @ caution 2.o | credit |